Desert Island Things

There used to be a UK radio show called Desert Island Discs. In fact maybe it is still limping along after all these years. Celebrities and people you had never heard of would go on and bore you with tales of the music and books they would take on a desert island with them. It was rubbish but it give me a bit of inspiration.

You don’t expect me to fashion my own clothes out of palm leaves and seaweed, do you? I will take a few pairs of men’s pants with me thank you very much. Actually, how long do you think you would last on a desert island before you gave up on such conventional things as wearing pants and combing your hair? If you wear those ridiculous jeans which hang so low it looks as though you lost 20 pounds in weight since leaving home it probably wouldn’t take you long I guess, since they would drop right off when you did genuinely lose 20 pounds.

Does it get cold at night on desert islands? I only ask because I heard that in deserts (not the island type) it gets freezing cold. But does the water keep it warmer or make it colder? Maybe I should take a heat pump with me just in case. Can you imagine dying of hypothermia on a desert island? That would be so embarrassing.

A pair of wedge flip flops always comes in handy on the beach. I reckon I would end up eating them after a few days but by then I would have feet which were hard, calloused and burned to smithereens. Oh stop, I am scaring myself now. This desert island lark isn’t all that easy after all. Why would you even want to listen to music while you are eating rubber sandals and getting your feet torn to shreds on burning hot sand?

Would looking at aluminium boats for sale be considered cheating? I only ask because I might fancy popping across to the mainland to buy some more sandals and maybe some indigestion tablets.

Footnote: I have just checked (thorough investigation is my middle name) and Desert Island Discs is still blooming running. It has been on the go since 1942 and is the second longest running radio programme in the world. Ever.

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