You know, writing on the internet is kind of interesting, but maybe it’s time I used the site to find a “real” job. Let’s see if I can find some ideas today.
A farmer. Worm farming has got to be pretty easy, hasn’t it? You don’t need to milk them, lead them into fields or carry big bales of hales about on a pitchfork. Maybe I could diversify by adding some spiders and caterpillars as well?
A baby finder. With the growth in popularity of camo baby clothes I am guessing that there might be a need for this service soon. You know what it’s like; you go to the woods for a picnic, put down Junior for a second and then can’t find him amongst the vegetation. Instead of waiting for the smell of a full nappy to lead you to him you could call me and I would come rushing to the scene armed with a fork and a fragile plate, because those are the kinds of things that always end up next to a baby when you turn away for a second aren’t they. I see that there are camouflage wedding dresses as well, so for a small commission I will hunt down missing brides too.
A tank driver. I had thought that you could only find army tanks for sale on the Russian black market but now I know better. I probably wouldn’t use it for nipping out to the shops but it could make a great taxi service or maybe a mobile store. Does anyone know if they have good fuel consumption rates?
A t-shirt slogan designer. My aunt once brought me back one of those awful “My aunt went to Spain/Florida/The moon and all she brought me back was a lousy t-shirt” affairs. Thanks auntie but you really shouldn’t have. Now I can get my own back by writing rude jokes and funny t-shirt slogans on items of clothing and giving them away to elderly relatives for Christmas.
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