Spare Me the Pills, Nurse

Arrgh, I’ve got the cold again, haven’t I? I woke up this morning with that familiar sore throat sensation and reached for the first aid cabinet. But isn’t it time to try a different remedy instead of using those same old pills again?

I have long thought that body quilting was the answer. Now hear me out on this one before you jump to any conclusions. I can envisage a type of wrap around quilt suit which only leave holes for your arms and legs. Oh, and your head as well I guess. This would be great for sweating out the illness in bed but not so great for going to the office in. Maybe I could design a cool version for going out in as well.

It might be a strange choice of remedy but I would like to try going to Denver International Airport. Isn’t it here that lots of strange things are meant to go on? I did some research on this subject and ended up in a weird conspiracy sight which told me that this airport is the centre of the new world order, that Paul McCartney died in the 60s and that modern food is designed to make us dumb and lethargic. Anyway, I thought the airport was a sort of voodoo place but it seems I was wrong.

I could buy some Reebok shoes and try to sweat out the virus the healthy way but to be honest I don’t think that I could run the length of myself today. It is scorching outside and I am sitting here with my fluffy slippers on and wrapped in a blanket.

I really need some vitamin C and I wonder how much of the stuff a hot dog has? There is a hot dog cart near my home and I am willing to eat as many of them as it takes to feel better.

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