The Olympics are pretty cool, aren’t they? I have long been a fan of televised sport and I look forward to this immensely every 4 years.
However, I just had a look at a list of ex Olympic events and was disappointed to see that sports such as tug of war and the excitingly named korfball are no longer included in the games. This shows that while some sports gain in popularity over the years there are also others which recede. Does this mean that I can invent some new sports now?
Olympic backyard landscaping sounds kind of groovy if we are being honest. Each competitor is faced with an unruly garden. Armed only with a regulation sized trowel and spade they need to be the first to get it whipped into shape. Athletes would need to have a blend of strength, perseverance and a good eye for a nice flower.
How many rice paper blinds can you eat in an hour? If it is more than 4 then you are eligible to enter into the window covering speed eating event. I was fascinated by rice paper as a kid and I also think that the Olympics are sadly lacking in sports which show off unusual eating skills. You may think that I am at risk of turning our most dignified sporting event into a cheap imitation of a tacky Japanese game show, and you would be right.
Bee keepers are definitely under represented in the Olympics. Can you imagine these guys getting involved though? They would need to sprint across the specially built Apidome and grab as much honey as they while avoiding getting stung. It would make for rivetting viewing I think. I saw a documentary a while ago about Indian guys who use smoke to get the bees to clear off while they climb the trees and snatch the honey. My bet is on India to win the gold medal.
On the face of it auto salvage doesn’t have much to offer the sporting world, does it? However, in my brave new world of Olympics it could be one of the most exciting games around. I am not quite sure how it would fit in but I reckon that it can’t be any worse than blooming gymnastics or those people who prance about in the water making funny faces